What?

This is my public profession.  I am unemployed.   This news has not been advertised.   Only those closest to me have been aware.  However, I am now sharing this with all of you as a lesson from the life of Tonya.

Life isn’t fair.  We know this.   Many have undoubtedly heard this from a very young age.   The hard fact is it’s a true statement.   Understand the seemed unfairness of it doesn’t mean life isn’t enjoyable or fun or to be unhappily lived.   It does mean life can be trying, and sometimes we desire a different outcome; a more fair, in our opinion, outcome.   The good news is, we can use these times to learn and grow!

Wow.  Talk about spring boarding into adulthood!  The transition from “life isn’t fair” to “what can I learn from this” is quite a leap.   But, once you accept it, you can move forward, and most importantly, learn something.

I am in a new, unwelcome and uncomfortable position. It’s not fair.  I am unemployed.   Shocked?  Me, too!  It has definitely been a difficult, yet enlightening, month and a half.   I lost a career I loved.  I mean, I  really enjoyed much of my career, but this was different.  It was perfect.

THE PATH I’VE TRAVELED

When I began my career, I worked in customer service.   This seemed a fitting choice as I enjoy talking with people, learning about them and helping meet their needs.  My experience working in customer service spanned several roles from food service to office environments to catering and hospitality.  Eventually, however, I decided it was time to make better use of my Psychology degree, and began looking at opportunities where my Bachelors Degree would qualify me for a role. Let me be clear.   Regardless of whether or not I am work directly in the field, I always use my degree.  Every interaction, communication, listening moment, etc. requires skills I attribute to my degree.

When I made the decision to move to my field of study, I was directed to a social services organization working with mentally and physically challenged adults.  I enjoyed the role, but very quickly learned my need to personally get to know everyone would lead me to becoming deeply attached to the clients.   Their heartbreak became mine; their struggles became my struggles.   While I don’t believe you can really care too much for others, I found myself caring too much to effectively continue in that role.   Around age 26, I was notified we had lost a client to disability-related health issues, and it was piercing for me.   As a result, I needed to step away.  I didn’t feel emotionally capable of separating myself from the clients we served.

I decided to find a role that would allow career advancement without emotional attachment.   As a result, in 1998 I chose a career at the opposite end of the spectrum.  I became a monkey in the concrete jungle of corporate America where I remained for 14 years.  I had the great fortune of working for a major CPG company with unbelievably intelligent people.  More importantly, my learning opportunities became abundant.   I was able to learn marketing from the ground up in real-time.   That education married to my “how can I help” personality was a win.  I worked on many amazing projects, and the skills learned in doing so were immeasurable.  Moreover, I found what I hoped to do for the rest of my career. I discovered sports marketing.

Through good fortune and a strong network in the sports industry, I was recruited for a new career adventure in 2012.   Blessed with a new and exciting role in the motorsports industry, my love of sports marketing and people happily collided.  I worked with clients around planning corporate hospitality and midway activations AND maintained a role in marketing as we advertised the company and our events to fans.  This role was truly the best of both worlds, I absolutely loved it.   Sadly, this perfect-for-Tonya role came to a screaming halt following our July event. I was let go.   I am unemployed.

WHAT’S NEXT

Unemployment does not become me.   Fair or not, there is not a next step in my career identified, let alone a job-for-now.  Yet, life demands this.  As a single mother, all the responsibility falls on me.   While I have an amazing family and an abundance of friends, in the end, it is my responsibility to look out for my family, ensure I know what next week will bring, and plan our household.   I protect our family security.  I make sure my children have insurance.  I make sure there is food in the house.   Though I lost my career, my work, it seems, is just beginning.

I have much to learn.  Up to this point my roles have always found me.   My career found me.  Now, I must actively search for the next chapter.  There are many things I like to do.   There are many available opportunities.   Unfortunately, those two things do not currently align.   I’ve been contacted with exciting opportunities.  However, these opportunities have been outside this area, and though I’m very flattered, relocation is not an option.  Therefore, I continue searching.   I check LinkedIn every morning, just after lunch and prior to going to bed; I speak with my network; I seek advice and information on any and all available roles.  I am, as they say, “pounding the pavement”, and that diligence will eventually lead me to my next great adventure.   I believe that.

MOVING ON

I’ll find my next step.   Time and patience will be required, but I’ll be better for it.   It doesn’t feel fair, and it’s not easy to navigate, but I choose to learn all I can about this process.   What I am learning is not only for me.   Someday my experience may provide opportunity to help someone else.   When that time comes, I will help to the best of my ability.  I will purposefully use this negative experience to learn so I can be positive for someone else.

I’ve had great experiences throughout a great career.  I will use the skills I have developed to further my career and make a difference.   For now, I have the chance to make use of my time doing something else I love.  I write.   I will become a better writer.

I owe thanks to Mollie Bentley at Midlife Pickle.   She has shown what I consider to be true bravery.  She chose to separate from her career; chose to start a blog, and chooses to help others.   Thanks to her and her blog, I realized you can have a successful blog that reflects your unique personality.   Please check it out.   She’s fantastic, and thanks to her whether she realizes it or not, I am now facing my last second chance at writing, finding my next career step, and learning!

Life isn’t fair, but you have second chances.   What second chance have you had when you faced an “unfair” situation?  Leave your comments below or contact me here!